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Okay, campers, rise and shine, and don’t forget your vegan sandals ’cause it’s hot out there today! It’s hot out there every day; what is this, the Jagajaga Federal Electorate? Not hardly, but it is the perfect time for both frozen gazpacho and blue-ballsing some ASMR weirdos with an empty promise … Continue reading Episode 14: Glory Hatch; or, The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a 99.4-odd Batting Average

No man is an island, even Captain Handsome, who recently returned from an island and would now very much like to be one but has instead settled for erecting a set of boundaries around himself as though he were a patch of arable land in fifteenth-century England. (Those guys said that … Continue reading Episode 13: Consumer Affairs’ Most Wanted; or, Apnoeite for Reconstruction

Finally back in Captain Handsome’s home office/studio/Idi Amin shrine after two weeks spent hitting, smashing, beckoning, summoning, upsizing, vaccinating, and otherwising, our intrepid hosts are fresh out of Gs and have never felt more amazin’ (that could just be the argon leak, though). Plus, all of these self-explanatory things: • White … Continue reading Episode 12: You’ve Gotta Be Judicious With Lube; or, Kill the John Butler in Your Head With the Knife He Forged

All work and no play makes Bitsy a dull boy All work and no play makes Bitsy a dull boy All work and no play mmakes Bitsy a dull boy All work and no PLay ma es Bitsy a dull boy All work and no play makes Bitsy a dull boy … Continue reading Episode 11: A Very Special Episode; or, Please Send Help

This week, our heroes are fearlessly testing the limits of remote recording technology. As will be apparent, Beautiful Fairy Princess has opted to record in an abandoned grain silo, whereas Captain Handsome joins us from twenty thousand leagues under the sea. Thence, they dare jointly pose the bold and entirely original … Continue reading Episode 10: Travis of Nazareth; or, Manifest Density